mimi smartypants
Seriously, though: what's with the penguins?
take a walk on the mild side
SEMI-LENGTHY SILENCE, SEMI-EXPLAINED 1. A mysterious revulsion at the very idea of communicating (and thus shaping) my thoughts. A desire for a return to some mute shadowy realm of Platonic forms. 2. BRB: need to chain-refresh Twitter and reddit following all the holy-shit breaking news. 3. Legit busy. Never-ending work project (the worst MIGHT be […]
make it safe and clean
CONTACT LAW ENFORCEMENT, I AM UNCONCERNED I just put eye cream—cream formulated specifically for eyes—all over my face. It felt nice and, well, creamy, so I just kept going with it. Yeah that’s right, EYE cream on my FACE. Call the cops, I don’t give a fuck! (Lately I am addicted to saying, “Call the […]
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