mimi smartypants
Seriously, though: what's with the penguins?

Archive for March 2003

some cosmic database

God was I bored at work the other day. Bored bored bored. (Right about now is when my mom would chime in with something mom-esque like “go run around the block” or “I have some chores you could do” or even “only boring people get bored,” but hey mom? Hey Imaginary Mental Mom Voice? Shush.) […]

puzzle-piece permutations

DO-IT-YOURSELF SMARTYPANTS ACTIONSometimes people who keep public diaries go on “hiatus.” Sometimes they have big hyperbolic dramatic reasons, like “Oh woe is me I have hurt too many people by shamelessly airing their dirty laundry in this public forum, whatever was I thinking, weep moan weep.” Or sometimes their life circumstances change dramatically—they move overseas […]

the occasional pantomimed upchuck

The old Medinah Temple here in Chicago, previously home to a lot of retro-cool Art Deco tile, is now a Bloomingdale's housewares store. Obviously this is not ideal, but at least the building itself was not destroyed and I can still look out my window at its faux Turkish copper domes. I got a little […]

maybe it's you.

HEY WOW JUST FOR SOMETHING DIFFERENT THE LINKS ARE AT THE TOPJerk your own adventure. Definitely owes something to the ever-fabulous Leisuretown, which should just be a comic book already. I'd buy it. I found this page through following up on some stupid comments about vegetarians (can't we just agree that your choice of pie-hole […]

though not quite a vegetable

BORING DREAM STUFF, STILL BORING EVEN THOUGH I SKIPPED A LOT OF DETAILSDream: LT and I were kidnapped. Back in Bahrain, in our old neighborhood, kidnapped by a bunch of dirty guys in dirty ghutras, with guns, and they wanted us to go to a certain restaurant where, I guess, they would kidnap us further. […]

erotically charged enigma, with soy sauce

Tax refund for me! Everybody say yeah! (Yeah!) After last year's debacle, when we owed two thousand dollars and I was convinced I would end up in debtor's prison, I totally changed my withholding scheme at work and that, combined with NASDAQ's shitty performance, means hooray hooray refund. What do you think? Pay off the […]

everybody out of the pool

LEVELS OF CHAOS, OR WHY I AM LATELY ABOUT AS ORGANIZED AS A BABY DUCK ON QUAALUDES1. My CD “collection” (that phrase always sounds so pretentious to me) is starting to occupy much more real estate than it should, and that is not at all because it is vast, but rather because it is sprawling. […]

a wealthy aesthete in search of an elusive ideal

There are many reasons why I have trouble keeping myself informed about this upcoming war with Iraq. One of them is that I am so turned off by the commentary on both sides, the dumbing-down of everything into a black-or-white issue (are you “for” the war? are you “against” the war?), and the tired rhetoric […]

no life at all in the house of dolls

COMPLAINTSGreetings. Welcome to CrabbyWorld. It basically sucks donkey cock to see you. Can I take your order? Oh yeah, like I was really going to take your order. Quit crying.1. I accidentally left my PDA thingy at home. (Why do I resist calling it a “Palm Pilot” or “Handspring”? Maybe because it's confusing, and also […]

faster, bay leaf! dill! dill!

All goofy and googly today. A full day of interviewing job candidates makes me strange. I alternate the buttoned-up businesslike (oh it is all fake. so fake. fake like the Tooth Fairy, fake like Laffy Taffy banana flavor, fake like the trashiest most synthetic falling-out weave on the head of the most tottery of high-heel […]

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