mimi smartypants
Seriously, though: what's with the penguins?

alcohol, tobacco, but not firearms

You know what, I've decided not to follow up on my story about the mysterious feminine hygiene product. Yes, I know, I'm a tease. But I decided it was neither interesting nor as amusing as it seemed at the time. So never mind.

Today I am bored, but I am wearing leopard-print tights. So at least my legs are interesting. I've wanted to smoke all week. Which is odd, since I quit over 6 years ago, and now only smoke in bars if my gin or beer consumption inches over a certain level. But all week I've been thinking about dragging on a tasty cigarette.

A Canadian friend told me that in Vancouver one cannot smoke in bars. Now, I'm all for clean air, and I'm totally for the smoke-free restaurants. (Even when I smoked I was always sensitive to the fact that other people might be trying to eat.) But there's something wrong about not allowing smoking in a bar. You're already unwholesome. You're paying good money to drink glass after glass of what is essentially a poison. So what's a little more poison in the air?

On the other hand, your clothes and hair would smell much nicer in the morning. Nothing like having a hangover and stinking up the place simultaneously.

—m. smartypants