mimi smartypants
Seriously, though: what's with the penguins?
there's a certain taboo about it
STUFF (NONSENSE TO FOLLOW) Industrial cookbook, although not in the usual sense. Food that tastes the way a guy beating a pipe with a hammer sounds! I don't want to ruin the surprise, but let's just say that I have Icedoutgear.com bookmarked for all my holiday shopping. Particularly the pimp cups. I wish you could […]
the police let her get away
THY NAME IS HYPOCRITE Often I complain about how no one seems capable of clear, concise communication anymore, and about how I am plagued by confusing stream-of-consciousness emails and badly-worded instructions and people who would rather hint around at the topic rather than just state their piece. Inevitably I will get done with one of […]
a watermark, with our compliments
Is the fig page not gorgeous? Good web design makes me want to eat figs! Here is a wacky fig fact: “Although considered a fruit, the fig is actually a flower that is inverted into itself.” That sounds like something Henry Miller would yammer on about. I have a dumb celebrity-crush on this total wastoid. […]
where's the funny soap?
This page on squirrel parasites is totally gross. I know, you were thinking that learning about squirrel parasites was going to be a shiny happy thing that would leave you feeling blissed out about the miracle that is life, but WRONG is now spelled Y-O-U. In contrast, this made me happy: a very funny review […]
a bobbly scrobbly squiggly wiggly dog
Who the hell do I think I am? I just spent almost three hundred dollars at Ann Taylor. I have been looking for something to wear to my sister's wedding, which is in the daytime but not at a church and elegant but not super-swanky cocktail elegant and do you see? Do you see what […]
sustain me with tempting morsels
A real entry will follow fairly soon. Right now I am dealing with the shock-horror of having a ROACH crawl around next to me on the El train window this morning. I know I shouldn't be surprised to find a roach in the big city, but eeew oh god I have roach issues. I hit […]
fall into the gap
I have this very clear scene in my head of a bunch of MRI technicians ordering one of those big stuffed pizzas, and then their shift ends before they get to eat it, or maybe they are called away to some other MRI facility for some kind of MRI emergency. Or whatever. Anyway, the new […]
darn you to heck
THE JUNKIE'S DILEMMA The over-the-counter Claritin works fine in the daytime, but cannot be taken at night unless I want to lay there in bed unsleeping and staring at nothing like a flounder.* Benadryl doesn't really do shit for my permanently stuffed-up allergic nose, but it does knock me out, so that I no longer […]
fifteenth-century France
LEFTOVERS 1. The other day I had a fresh apricot for the first time. I eat dried ones by the Costco-size bagful, but why had I never had them in their natural state? Fresh apricots, where have you been all my life? You are tasty and nice and small. The two-bite fruit. I was telling […]
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