make me a fancy sandwich
When I was a child, my mother never cut my sandwich into triangles. I don't know why, but it was always rectangles. The only time I ever saw a triangle sandwich was in a restaurant, and in my head I still think of this sort of sandwich cut as “fancy.” LT made me a grilled cheese and cut it into triangles, and I went, “oooh! Just like at the diner!” and explained my sandwich history to him, and he thought it was kind of sad. No, it's not abuse or neglect or satanic rituals, but it is deprivation of a sort and should be enough for me to write a depressing memoir about my childhood and get it on the Oprah show.
—mimi “little match girl” smartypants