hollywood, go away
So I finally saw the new Star Wars movie, because it came to the cheap-ass theater in my neighborhood. It had aliens and explosions and stuff. I only looked at my watch twice. Since I pretty much hate all movies, that's pretty much a stellar recommendation from me.
I don't really hate ALL movies, just about 98% of those from contemporary Hollywood. I love The Thin Man in all its incarnations (Nick and Nora Charles are my personal heroes.) I love Katherine Hepburn, especially when she's doing comedy. I love the Marx Brothers. I loved “Fargo,” “Big Lebowski,” and other things Coen. And I have a VERY STRANGE fondness for what LT calls “swords and sandals,” that is, “cast of thousands”-type greek and roman epics from the '50s/early 60s. Men in leather loincloths! Women with bouffant hairdos and blue eyeshadow! I never knew that was in style in ancient Rome! And fabulous, stilted dialogue!
But I digress. I'm not sure why I hate most modern movies. Most of them seem to be about the star and not about the story or the photography or the dialogue. It's like, “Hmm, let's write a movie with Julia Roberts in it.” (Does anyone else besides me think she's weird looking?) And one more shout-out to Hollywood: MAYBE YOU COULD HAVE AN ORIGINAL IDEA. I'm sick to death of “writers” plundering old and NOT-GOOD television shows to make movies. I mean really, The Flinstones? The Brady Bunch? Get a life, people.
Rant mode off.
The weekend was ever so nice. Friday night I went out to various bars with LT, Marc, and Mike. An evening full of beer and boys. One of the places we stopped was the Bucktown Pub, whose bartender is this tranvestite-looking woman (who apparently is actually female, although I swear I didn't believe it at first and I'm usually pretty good at guessing those things), and when we walked in she yelled at each of us in turn, “Yeast infection? Yeast infection? Yeast infection?” Turns out she knows Marc, that's the bar's term for a half-and-half (Black and Tan, if you're a Loyalist), and that's what he usually orders.
I did not have a yeast infection.
Whew.
—mimi smartypants